Why I Quit YouTube

So yesterday I did a thing.  I quit YouTube.  My channel is still alive, and I don’t plan on deleting it any time soon.  (Why put in all the hard work to make those videos only to delete it all???)  But I am done.  I am done being a YouTuber.  I am done creating videos.  I am done with YouTube.

Before I go into my reasons why I’m quitting YouTube, I feel like you need to know my reasons why I started a channel in the first place.  Rewind to Fall 2016…

I started out paper crafting in July 2016.  It was simple really, I had an idea for an anniversary gift for my husband, I searched Pinterest and got sucked in to the snailmail community.  (If you’re unaware, there’s an entire community of crafters that just create paper crafting projects that they mail to each other, usually in some sort of swap form where other goodies are given as gifts.)

I joined Instagram, started my following, and got a few pen pals.  Enter Mary.

Mary and I started as pen pals, but she was pretty persistent that we needed to be actual, real life friends.  So I caved.  And soon we were texting each other everyday.  I have Mary to thank for convincing me to start scrapbooking instead of snailmailing.

By September, Mary and I had concocted a plan to start a YouTube channel.  It would be a YouTube channel like no other, where two friends would address each other in their videos, with a back and forth style, essentially crafting with each other.

We were pumped!  The channel would be called Create Craft Repeat (a play off of our Instagram names @createdtocreate365 and @kira.gets.crafty).  Our launch date was set for October 1st.

The channel was nothing like our vision.  Mary had too much going on to post consistently, so the channel was about 75% Kira and 25% Mary.  But whatever, we had subscribers, we had views, we were gaining a following!

Besides wanting a fun crafty outlet with my friend, there was a second reason I started a YouTube channel…I wanted to be on a design team!  No, I was DESPERATE to get on a design team.  My whole goal in life was to make a design team.  And I thought this was a necessary step to make that dream a realty.

In hind sight, I didn’t need the channel to get on a design team.  I needed to improve as a crafter, improve my photography, and be a presence in the community.  But I was younger back then, and was convinced YouTube was going to get me on my first design team.

Fast forward to Winter 2017…Mary was going through some stuff in her personal life (that’s her story to tell, but you can catch the details in this video).  And was posting to our channel sporadically.  And after months of bugging her, Mary finally posted a farewell video March 2018 so I could take over the channel for myself.

If you are curious about that friendship, I’ll just say this:  we haven’t spoken in five months.

But after Mary left the channel, I had big plans for it.  I was going to start a new series, I was going to post more frequently, I was going to ask some of my friends to do collaborations.  Big plans.

But then the views started dwindling.  I went from getting 500+ views per video to 200+ views per video.  My confidence was wavering.

Did all of our subscribers only subscribe for Mary’s videos?  Was anyone here just for me?

Around that same time (May 2018) I had reapplied for one of my design teams (I had made six by this point, by the way, none of which I believe is thanks to my channel), and I was starting to question if I would be chosen back on.  Days went by and I started to become more complacent that I would not be joining the team for a second term.  And my confidence was shook some more.  I could barely craft, my mojo had completely disappeared.

So I stopped making videos.

And then I was asked back on the team I was convinced didn’t want me.  Phew.

It took a few days to start getting my mojo back.  And I am not super proud of what I made.  And probably less proud of how much I let something so silly affect my confidence.

I started making videos again at the end of June and thought, now is the time I get serious about making some changes to this channel.  But the views dropped even more.

THEN…our computer stopped being able to recognize my phone when I plugged it in.  It was an old computer, it was time for an upgrade.  But I was using Windows Movie Maker for my editing, and you may have heard that there’s not a great FREE alternative to Movie Maker on newer computers.

So I played around with new software, all of which was free.  And I struggled.  Nothing was quite as simple and streamlined as Movie Maker.  I spent 4 hours one day editing a video.  Four.  Hours.

Now here’s about the point I started really contemplating if YouTube was right for me.  And here’s my list of why I ultimately decided to quit:

1.  I don’t even watch YouTube, guys.  Maybe a video here and there, mostly my friends who I want to support.  But I don’t go to YouTube for inspiration.  It’s just not my jam.
2. My views were waaaaay down.  I don’t think this is anyone’s fault but my own.  I was consistent and then I wasn’t.  I started with snailmail videos, diy embellishment videos and process videos…then focused solely on process videos.  There was a lot of change, so it’s not the subscribers’ fault if they weren’t interested in process videos only.
3. My original reasons for starting the channel were gone.  My friend doesn’t exist as my friend anymore and I made design teams.  C’est la vie.
4. My children are no longer taking naps.  This may seem like an odd reason, but for those of you with small children, you’ll understand.  I was usually spending nap time (2-3 hours per day) either creating, recording a voice over or editing a video.  Then that 2-3 hours a day vanished.  So to get that back, I would be missing out on either time with my children or time with my husband.
5. Time.  With my new computer, time to edit increased substantially.  And I just don’t have that time.
6. Cost.  I tried the free version of Filmora, and it’s great.  If you are looking for an alternative to Movie Maker, I can’t recommend this software more!  But the free version puts a watermark on your videos (which I didn’t want) and the not free version cost $60 (that I don’t have).
7. Everyone knows you can monetize your videos on YouTube and its a great way to supplement this hobby…but you probably don’t realize how much people are actually getting paid.  I am lucky to be on 6 AMAZING design teams.  So I don’t have to pay for 95% of the product I use on my projects, which is nice, because I am a stay at home mom and my husband’s salary is just enough to get us by.  Without design teams, I would definitely not be able to create the layouts that I do, it’s thanks to them that I can afford things like photo paper, and printer ink to print my photos.  YouTube supplements the rest of my budget, or, it did.  When Mary was creating videos with me, we made $100+ every three months, so about $50 each, every 3 months.  This paid for my paper, adhesive, you know, the “essentials”.  I haven’t received a single payment since she left the channel…that’s how low my views are.  So while I could justify the time spent creating videos before, it is now impossible to justify.
8. It stopped being fun.  I started focusing too much on views.  And thumbs up.  And the dreaded thumbs down.  And it stressed me out.  And it stopped being fun.

So goodbye YouTube.  It’s been…something.  I love and appreciate all the loyal subscribers of mine who watched my videos and commented on them and just shared a little bit of their love and appreciation with me.  And I can’t say you’ll never see me again, because maybe someday I will decide to go back.  But for now, goodbye.

xo, Kira